1. You�re eavesdropping and you hear your boss has reservations at his favorite restaurant. You know, the one you can�t afford. Call them back and cancel his reservations � say you�re his wife.
21. Call the fire department and pretend you are in the office next door to yours and exclaim there is a massive inferno in the building next to yours. It is guaranteed to raise your manager�s blood pressure a few points or more when the firemen arrive.6. Take your eyeliner and smears it in his chair when he�s not looking. His wife will feel needed when she has to heartily scrub and wash his pants.41. When the boss is out of town, forward the phones to your house and take a nap. Run back to the office if something needs to be done.The brokers charge their own fees, often between $20 and $25 per $100 of loan principal. The cost to the consumers on the short-term loans is equivalent to more than 600 percent annual interest.32. Stockpile in your office your manager�s favorite type of pen so that he is constantly bewildered as to where they are disappearing and continues to order new boxes of pens repeatedly.35. Announce at the next company birthday (cake eating in the lunchroom) that the boss is giving everyone a 10% raise. When your manager pulls you into his office to discuss this, say that he sure is losing his sense of humor in his old age.The contagion soon started to infect the rest of Wall Street. A few days after Lehman's collapse, a senior Vice-Chairman at Morgan Stanley rang Paulson to say that speculators and short-sellers were calling for blood, undermining confidence in his bank and pummelling its shares. Disaster spilled out of the stock markets and into markets for commercial paper, threatening the survival of large companies like GE by shutting down their access to short-term liquidity.36. Stack all incoming unwanted sales related faxes and printed e-mails on your manager�s desk and connect all sales related calls to him, especially the stock brokers. When your manager comments that he would like you to screen all sales related material and calls, comment that you thought he was open to new ideas and new people and didn�t realize he was so introverted.15. When you arrive late, move all clocks back. When you want to leave early, move all clocks forward. Pretend that all the batteries need to be replaced.31. When your boss invites you to the company Christmas party, matter-of-factly state that you�d prefer to spend it with rabid dogs and wild monkeys, but proclaim your sincere thanks just the same.12. Replace the vodka in the liquor cabinet with water. You�re doing him a favor, really you are. When he comments that his vodka tastes like water, respond smartly by saying that it appears that just about everyone is cutting corners these days.42. Position a cup of coffee on your manager�s desk so that when he sits down, you can pretend to fumble for papers on his desk and easily knock it onto his lap. State that you hope it isn�t hot and that no third degree burns are inflicted.�15.19 (plus �2.45 p&p) 0870 429 665529. Call in sick and leave a message on the company�s voice mail. State that you are ill due to the overwhelming imbalance of wealth and power within the company�s structure and your illness should subside once you are paid what you are worth.9. Enlist a friend to deliver papers appearing to be legal documents that insinuate he is being sued for 4 million dollars. Put word �joke� on the last page of the 20-page document. It will be fun to watch beads of sweat form on his brow."Maximum interest rates have been in Maryland law for many years, and we're gratified that the General Assembly is reinforcing those for the benefit of consumers," he added.We witness moral hazard in the making. As the Lehman's collapse looms, the leaders of the major American investment banks clearly expect the government to step in to rescue Lehmans and the other at-risk banks in the same way they rescued Bear Stearns and Fannie and Freddie. They clearly believe in 'too big to fail'. Indeed, Dick Fuld, the Lehman chief, insists on $10 a share for his worthless bank at one point, partly from hubris, and partly because he does not think the government will let him go under. This risk-blind behaviour goes on almost to the very end.There are reasons to doubt this version of events. There is another story going around, that the FSA would have approved the deal had Paulson been willing to share the risk of supporting the merger.19. For your manager�s birthday, hire a palm reader to read your manager�s palm. Pay them an extra $50 to say �Oh My� in the middle of the reading and not be able to continue.'This is the economic equivalent of war, ' Paulson said in the middle of the financial crisis in 2008, scrambling to find a resolution for AIG before the insurance behemoth brought down the entire economy. Warfare is certainly what it felt like. For those who lived out the financial crisis on trading desks around the world, reading Paulson's account will be like reliving the nightmare weekend when Lehman Brothers collapsed in September 2008.The new law would require the interest and fees combined to come in at or below the 33 percent cap.The discount offers on books in this section remain open for three months from date of publication. Email: books@spectator. co. ukThe bill, H.B. 79, passed the Senate 47-0 late Monday night and now heads to the governor's desk for his signature. The House of Delegates passed the bill 106-29 on March 19.22. Time your manager when he goes out to run personal errands and comment that he took an exceptionally long break when he returns.by Hank PaulsonThe core of the tale is the crucial weekend when Paulson tries to cobble together a private sector rescue for Lehman. Paulson paints an extraordinary scene, of the ultracompetitive leaders of the big American investment banks, alpha males all, trying to work together to rescue their rivals. You can almost smell the testosterone and adrenaline coming off the page.26. When you are simply not in the mood to get out of your chair, proclaim that the copier is broken when your boss asks for copies to be made. If your manager attempts to make copies on his own and exclaims it works just fine, jam a paper clip in the innards of the copy machine when nobody is looking.50. Once a week, send an anonymous email to your boss that is spiteful in nature. To kick it off, the first one should simply read, �you are pond scum.�It was a good question. Financial crisis and collapse is nothing new. In relatively recent times, we have seen the spectacular collapse of individual institutions like Salomon Brothers and Long Term Capital Management, not to mention the savings and loan calamity in the 1980s and the crisis in the Lloyd's of London reinsurance market.3. Put chocolate ex-lax in your manager�s chocolate licorice. Not only will you feel better, it may wipe that constipated look off of his face too.ThinkCash, a Texas-based credit services firm, runs the lending Web site paydayone.com.2. Have a friend of yours make an anonymous call to your boss saying that they know what he has been up to, possess incriminating pictures, and hang up. It will scare the bejesus out of him.The Chancellor's strong warning, wrapped in his characteristic Scottish courtesy, was completely lost on the American Treasury Secretary. Paulson writes, 'It occurred to me that I had not caught his [Darling's] true meaning. . . .What I'd taken as understandable caution should have been taken as a clear warning.'Paulson had been counting on Barclays to come to Lehman's rescue, but in the final hours, Paulson received a call from John Varley, the CEO of Barclays, who said that 'the FSA had declined to approve the deal'.30. When your boss asks for a donation to his son�s little league fund, ask what the minimum amount is that you can donate in order to keep your job.As one can imagine, the situation was incredibly complex. As the most talented minds were seeking a solution for Lehman at the Federal Reserve, news of impending disaster at Merrill Lynch and at AIG started to trickle in. The contagion was spreading.23. Run into the office exclaiming to your manager that his car has a huge dent in the side! Walk outside with him when he goes out to examine it. After he looks it over thoroughly and asks you what you saw because he can�t see it, apologize that it must have just been the way the light was reflecting on it that made it appear that way.Darling's caution was partly a reluctance to increase the City's exposure to the shaky American markets, but in large part he was facing a restriction of British law. Moreover, Paulson himself recognised that the regulatory structure 'had not begun to keep up with the evolution of the markets . . . [which] led to counterproductive competition among regulators, wasteful duplication in some areas, and gaping holes in others".39. As soon as your boss returns from a vacation, ask where he went and always state that you vacationed there a few years ago and how fantastic it was.28. Using desktop publishing, relabel a can of bug spray as vanilla air freshener and place in men�s bathroom.49. When your boss says �good morning�, quickly reply, �Oh is it?�As the troubles at Lehman Brothers developed, Paulson writes that the British Chancellor of the Exchequer, Alistair Darling, was someone with whom he thought he had 'a good working relationship and who shared [his] views on the markets', concluding that Darling was a 'straight shooter'. You can get no greater compliment than that from an American.25. Superglue two middle pages of your manager�s favorite book and return to the shelf. He will find it after the glue has permanently set.11. Put your boss on all of the mailing lists of his most detested organizations and clubs. When he asks you to call and have them remove him from the lists, say of course, and never do it.38. When company phone bill gets passed around asking you to highlight your personal calls, always state that you would never do that and never highlight anything. Say your family and friends all reside in Tasmania.'The British screwed us, ' Paulson cried, landing the blame for Lehman's collapse squarely at Alistair Darling's door.18. Out of the blue, say you have an emergency appointment with your astrologer and it is important that you leave now because your charts are waiting!44. On casual dress day, wear a bathing suit top and the shortest shorts that you own. When you are called into your boss�s office to discuss this, ask for a list that defines the parameters of the casual dress day code.
50. Once a week, send an anonymous email to your boss that is spiteful in nature. To kick it off, the first one should simply read, �you are pond scum.�
Author: Dawnell Harrison
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